Diminuendo – Chapter 8: Tremolo

Chapter 8: Tremolo

Adriel barely slept a wink. He was…agitated. In a frenzy. Keyed up. Stretched like taffy through a taffy puller. He’d done his nightly (despite it being morning) prayer, crawled into bed, and found no peace. Only the howling winds of his mind filling his ears. Causing his heart to pound, his blood to rush, and sweat to prickle down his back. He felt strangely vulnerable, even in his own bed with the door closed. Like someone had taken a stick and poked him full of holes. 

And listening to Shiloh sniffle in the nearby room didn’t help. He didn’t realize how thin the doors and walls in this house were until he had to share them with someone else. He’d stayed in the kitchen, sipping tea and forcing his mind to focus on his bible, while Shiloh argued with someone upstairs. He’d unwillingly caught a few words—No, sorry, Rina—even as he steadfastly stared down at the passages. 

Do not take heart all the things that people say, lest you hear your servant cursing you. 

He was trying to make her comfortable. Trying to keep her safe. But Adriel knew that Shiloh probably had…less than positive emotions about the situation she was in. At the same time, that didn’t mean he wanted to hear anything she had to say about him. Or the issues he was associated with in her life. And if that made him a coward, he would ask for forgiveness later. 

When she finally fell silent he tried to creep upstairs. Only to freeze in mortification as her sobs drifted out into the hallway. He’d darted down the hall to his room and shut the door as quietly as possible. Still, the sound of her cries persisted. Adriel had gone through his nightly routine, his only reprieve from the sound was when he brushed his teeth in his bathroom, and was forced to listen to her cry while he laid in the darkness. Then the house fell silent. Still he laid in bed, staring at his ceiling. Haunted. By his thoughts. By the echoes of sobs. By past memories as sweet as sugar and bitter as poison. Both leading to an inevitable death. 

Adriel’s eyes eventually fell shut. But seemingly a moment later he blinked awake. Eyes burning and crusty, in the same position, and tiredness lingering over him. He gave sleep up as a lost cause and sat up. Stretching, every bone in his body seemed to crack, muscles twitching and aching with fatigue. He sighed and moved out of bed. Adriel showered, brushed his teeth again, put on day clothes, and shuffled down the stairs. When he made it to the kitchen, he looked through his pantry and fridge. 

“French toast maybe?” he muttered to himself, voice cracking slightly. A yawn squeaked through his jaw and he brought a hand up to cover it. “Mmm, I think the milk’s still good…” He pulled out a loaf of brioche bread that was perhaps a little stale. But it didn’t smell weird or have any green spots on it. Alongside eggs, milk, and unopened containers of cinnamon and vanilla, he pulled out a few pre-packaged sausage and hash brown patties. Then throwing on an apron, he tied his hair back and got to work. The oven was easily preheated and the ingredients for french toast were whipped together. When the pans of sausage and hashbrowns were cooking in the oven, he put the kettle on the stove and started a pot of coffee. 

He didn’t know what foods Shiloh liked or what she liked to drink in the morning. Hopefully whatever groceries Pierce and Maria sent his way would suffice. Adriel wasn’t particularly picky himself. He was about halfway done cooking the french toast when he heard the sound of movement upstairs. Surely enough, he heard the bathroom door open, then shut, and the sound of water gurgling through the pipes soon after. A sudden bolt of urgency shot through him. It would be nice if he had everything ready and presented for her by the time she came downstairs. 

“Hot tempers cause arguments, but patience brings peace,” he murmured to himself, almost hearing Father Asaph’s voice as he did. That was a lesson he’d struggled to learn and thus a passage he was more than familiar with. He took a deep breath and continued on. Soon enough, the french toast sat on its platter. And the sausages and hash browns in their pans. The kettle released puffs of steam and the smell of coffee intertwined with the other scents of the kitchen. Wiping off his hands, he put the dishes in the sink to clean later. It was as he started to think about how he should present the meal that a knock sounded at his door. 

His spine prickled and a sharp breath silently pressed through his lips. Adrenaline began to course through his veins, liquid fire trickling with each beat of his heart. He swore in his head when he remembered his gun was still upstairs. But he quickly regained his calm and instead reached for the switchblade he kept in the drawer of the island. He crept towards the door, knife tucked into his pocket. There was also a crowbar hidden underneath the couch. And a mini baseball bat wedged between the bars of the front porch. Adriel wasn’t particularly experienced with firearms anyways. 

He took a deep breath and forced himself to calm down. If he was itching for a fight he would get one, Avoiding a fight is a mark of honor; only fools insist on quarreling. It wasn’t like the murderer was going to show up at his front door, for no reason, during daylight… Well, it was possible but very unlikely. A serial killer like Genesis had to possess some sort of caution if she went this long without being caught. 

He reached and opened the door to the sight of a stranger. His hair stood on end but he refused to jump to conclusions. The stranger blinked before turning to face him. She held a hand out and gave him a wide grin. 

“Hi, I’m Mara! I’m here for Shiloh?” 

Adriel didn’t take her hand, too distracted trying to take the strange stranger in. She had blonde, wavy hair currently tied back into a ponytail that ended somewhere towards the middle of her back. And bright green eyes that glinted in the light when she grinned. She wore a long white skirt, full of pleats, which swayed below her knees in the cold wind. She also had a mustard yellow blouse with a black shawl thrown over her shoulders and a black handbag tucked under her arm. 

Overall, she seemed normal enough. Yet something inside him screamed. Danger, danger, danger. His skin broke out into goosebumps, jaw setting stubbornly, and body preparing for a fight. Before he could spring into action however, the sound of feet pounding down the stairs drew his attention. He jumped, heart tripping in his chest, and drew in a breath to tell Shiloh to get back upstairs. 

“Mara? Is that you?” Shiloh called, leaning over the banister. When she caught sight of the woman in the doorway, her face broke out in a huge smile. It took the wind out of his sails and left him sputtering. 

Shiloh finished coming down the stairs and slipped past him to stand in front of the stranger. “Sorry, I hope you didn’t have to wait long,” she said, somewhat breathlessly. Shiloh looked up at her with glimmering eyes, a smile still painted on her lips. 

Adriel realized he’d yet to see her grin like that. He’d seen her grateful little twitch of lips, the exhausted turn of a bitter smirk, but he hadn’t seen her actually smile yet. For some reason, this realization brought a frown to his lips. 

Something changed in the stranger too. He couldn’t quite put it into words. But the energy around her seemed to shift. Relax. Adriel watched the way her shoulders drooped, the way the lines around her grin lessened, yet something sharp still remained in those eyes. He swore he saw her pupils dilate. 

“Any wait is worth it for you,” she said, voice a low purr. Shiloh blinked, eyes widening and lips parting. Her cheeks darkened in what he assumed was a blush. 

His frown deepened to a snarl and something sour seemed to curdle in his stomach. He could feel something growling inside him. Something close to anger but not quite anger. It was overwhelming, the corners of his vision fuzzing with static. It reminded him of being a child and being forced into overcrowded rooms full of people, and bright lights, and noise. How his mind would turn in on itself, his body becoming too big yet too tight, and how the only way to release that tension was to scream and throw a fit. 

Adriel closed his eyes and forced a few deep breaths into straining lungs. He was a grown adult now, he couldn’t dissolve into screaming and kicking, he reminded himself. No matter how much he wanted too. Even if he was feeling an emotion he wasn’t familiar with and that was new and upsetting. And it was all caused by the stranger darkening his doorstep. He squeezed his fists a few times and wriggled his toes. His emotions did not control him, he controlled his emotions. Even if it didn’t seem like it sometimes. He lost himself in the constant cycle of breathing and forcing himself back into his body. 

“Adriel, are you feeling alright?” He opened his eyes to Shiloh’s concerned face. Her eyes were all big and hands awkwardly hanging in the air, like she wasn’t sure if she could touch him or not. Over her shoulder the stranger looked at him in faux worry. He knew it was fake, holding the expression in the mirror of his mind, even if it looked authentic. The downturn of her lips, the slight scrunch of her brow, even the slight watery look of her eyes. It was a perfect recreation of a worried expression. But he knew he was right. His mirror was as clear as ever and he could tell it was too perfect. Practiced. He could smell the deceit from under the mask. 

But that wasn’t a crime and he forced himself to put it aside. Instead he turned a wavering grin to Shiloh and nodded. 

“Yeah, just not feeling the best right now,” he said softly. It wasn’t a lie exactly, he certainly wasn’t feeling good right now. Shiloh’s brows furrowed further and she opened her mouth to speak. 

But he turned his attention back onto the stranger, holding out a hand. “Sorry, can I get your name?” he asked, forcing some energy into his voice. From the amused twitch of her lips, they both knew he was pretending. But she held a perfectly manicured hand out to shake. 

“It’s Mara, I told you earlier but you seem a little out of it,” she said. Her voice came out sugary sweet and she didn’t even try to hide her condescending tone. Something in his face began to twitch with irritation. But he merely locked his jaw and stiffly shook her hand. 

“It was a long night,” he forced through grit teeth. 

She tittered and tucked her hand behind her back. 

Shiloh swayed and took a half-step back, looking between them with furrowed brows.

“Can I get your name?” Mara asked. He huffed, she was lying about her name. But to what extent she was lying he couldn’t tell. It seemed to be a small lie, Mara was probably a nickname or alias. 

“Adriel,” he muttered. 

A mean glint entered her eye. 

“Flock of God?” she said, barely containing her laugh. 

Adriel refused to feel ashamed, but still his ears and face began to burn, “I prefer the my help is God translation,” he snapped. 

Shiloh stepped between them. “Okay, that’s enough you two,” she said, glaring at them both, “I don’t know what’s happening but you’re both my friends now, so you’ll have to get along.” 

Adriel blinked. You consider me to be a friend, he had the urge to ask, but kept silent when he realized how pathetic it sounded. Instead he clicked his tongue and gave a stilted nod. 

Mara’s attention was completely focused back on Shiloh, a clearly fond look on her face, “of course darling,” she soothed, reaching out to squeeze her arm, “are you ready to go?” 

Only then did he realize how Shiloh was dressed. She wore a set of black slacks with a matching leather belt. And an oversized dark brown knit sweater. She also had a bit of makeup on, just a touch of highlight on her cheeks and something glittery on her lids. A purse sat on her shoulder. It was clear that she was going out. 

“If you’re going out, stay safe,” he said needlessly. He couldn’t help but to cross his arms. “Keep your phone and ringer on, just in case.” 

Shiloh relaxed and she smiled at him, “of course, I’ll be back before it gets dark. 

Adriel nodded his head gratefully and looked to the stranger. “You be safe as well,” he scolded, “it’s not safe to be wandering around.” 

Mara laughed and tilted her chin up. “I’m perfectly capable of keeping myself and Shiloh safe,” she leered, as if she were a queen speaking to her subject. It rubbed him the wrong way but he bit back any response he wanted to give. 

He turned back to Shiloh instead, “have a good time,” he said. 

She gave a firm nod of her head before shooting him a soft look. “Try to relax today, especially if you’re not feeling well,” she said. Her words melted something cold in him and he had the fleeting urge to beg her to stay. Before he could explore the impulse further, she had already turned away and walked out the door. With Mara’s arm slung around her back and shoulders. 

The stranger only looked back once. 

“Get well soon,” she said, face set in a smug smirk. 

He shot her one last glare and shut the door. 

Whoever she was, he didn’t like her. She was a liar. And unbearably cocky and smug. He squeezed the bridge of his nose and sighed. How did someone like Shiloh end up in the same circle as Mara? When he looked back up, he was met with the most likely cold breakfast he’d spent the morning making. He let out another sigh and pulled down a plate. No point in letting it go to waste. And the leftovers would keep. He chewed on lukewarm, soggy french toast. And worked through tough sausage and icy hash browns. He sipped on a mug of semi-warm coffee and dumped the water in the kettle down the sink. 

A voice inside him told him it was nothing less than he deserved. That he was a fool. That he should be ashamed. He didn’t know why but he didn’t have the strength to deny it. All while that unfamiliar feeling stirred inside him, prowling like a beast.